There’s an interesting debate happening around stress. Are we a more stressed society these days, are we bringing up a generation of stressed out children or was it more stressful, say, 30 years ago?

These days it seems anyone’s life can be played out on social media, and we are scrutinised on things we do and say. If you are having your every move monitored and commented on – that’s stressful isn’t it?

if we turn back time though, surely times were harder? There was a ‘done’way of being and doing and a lot of repression and suppression – you fell into line and any misgivings you had you just had to suck it up and get on with it. I can truly see how stressful that would be – stress and any type of anxiety or depression was completely frowned upon. So very little was said about it.

For me, I think it is totally subjective. I could come up with as many reasons for thinking life is more stressful now and as I could about life a few decades ago.

I certainly think we talk about it more now and that is a good thing. But there is a lot of misunderstanding about around the source of stress. When we point to things that we think cause stress – jobs, money, relationships, Facebook etc – we are missing the point. These things we point to are outside of us, but the actual SOURCE of stress is much closer to home. It is the source we need insight on in order to understand how we are creating it and how these so called causes (the money etc) are showing up for us.

The feelings we experience (stress or otherwise) are Intrinsically linked to the thoughts we are having in that very moment. Without exception we live in the feeling of our thinking. It is the way we are feeling about things that determines how we experience them, and that becomes our reality.

Have you every had an experience of feeling very strongly about someone and it felt absolutely real to you – and then you had a realisation about the person that completely changed the way you thought about them? Did you notice how your feelings changed and in turn your experience of the person changed too, even the way you remembered them?

This is how the human operating system works, it is not subjective, it is the same for everyone – we all live in the feeling of our thinking. So if we really want to tackle stress, we need to start to look at what is being created inside of us, not to what is out there.